June has always been a hard month for me to get through. Right around Memorial Day I start getting that knot in my stomach and prepare myself for the month ahead. Both my parents birthdays were in June and then there's also Father's Day.
Three reminders of them not being here is still hard for me, even after all these years. My husband and others have noticed that I'm very sensitive and emotional during the month. Sometimes a little short fused on certain days. I don't mean to be, I guess its just my way of dealing with the loss.
For some reason this year I was realizing how long they have been gone and how old they would be on this birthday. I think of all the things they were not here for. I wonder what it would of been like to have them here to watch my daughter grow up and what kind of grandparents they would be. This June I was able to do something that really helped my grief. I took a few days away to where my parents ashes are scattered.