How are you feeling about the job you are doing as a parent or caregiver?
It's a big job, with a lot of responsibility.
People are depending on you.
Maybe things are going well and you're confident. Maybe not so much.
I know sometimes I feel discouraged. I know for a fact that some people don't like me, and I let it get to me. Certainly there's truth to it. I could be a better person.
In fact, when I had my first daughter, one of my secret reasons for going back to work, was that I thought she'd be better off if she could spend time away from me each day. I loved her like crazy, and wanted the best for her. So, I continued my professional work, and hired professionals to un-do any damage that my flawed self might have inflicted on her in the evening and overnight.
(I really was not a terrible parent, but I was so insecure and sensitive to criticism, that this somehow made sense to me.)
In retrospect, maybe I had some postpartum depression. Maybe negative messages from my past haunted me. Maybe I was overly insecure or sensitive. Or maybe, I was just unprepared for the job I was trying to do.
For many of us, there is no safety net or training, other than maybe government programs or less involved family members, neighbors or friends. If you are an individual or part of a team trying to raise healthy children or care for family members who are not well, you are right to consider it an overwhelming task. But you can do it better than anyone else can. And quite possibly, if you want it done well at all, you have to do it.
You can, too.
I have no crystal ball or guarantee, but if you do your homework, and study up, you can be better prepared and feel better about the job you are doing than I did with my first child. Being prepared goes a long way.
- Understand what you are up against or trying to accomplish.
- If you are dealing with an illness, get a diagnosis and medical guidance.
- Research symptoms and support groups online or in your community. Talk to friends.
- Find others who are going through similar things, from new mom support groups,the PTA, co-workers, neighbors to disease specific online communities.
- Understand your insurance and needs, current and future. Are there government, church or community programs to access?
- Ask for what you need.
- Show up and try.
- Take a break, get air, some exercise, some silence, and go back for more.
- Be confident and strong. You can do it.
Keep it up. You're doing a great job!
Kirsten
Photo courtesy of stock.schng
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